99 Miles by Raven Duran

I'm doing 99 on 99

3 hours of highway passed

Black trees cast shadows 

On vacant hillsides

Obscure in the morning sun

Race the clock

And the clouds

The rain falls in my brain

As above; so below

Isn't that what they say?

What kind of quiet do I feel in this space?

99 miles an hour

28,000 feet and going fast

This place doesn't feel like home to me

Get me out of Nowhere Land

 

-R

 

MY MUSE by Raven Duran

You are my muse. The very thing that moves me to the point of creation.

Every time.

You are time and time again the seed that blossoms in my mind. Each creation, each piece I write somewhere in the words, in the letters, you are there. The beauty that flows through me when I think of you is insurmountable.

Things I didn’t even know I knew, I do with you. Your existence in my world, your steps on this planet — make me want to experience everything this life has to offer.

Even the pain. The beautiful pain that draws from it a beautiful awakening within my soul. The pain which allows me to recognize my abilities. Great pain and great power and great love and great joy.

This is a single moment with you.

I create with you in my heart, as it’s the only way I know how to reveal what I am.

I create for you because I can not otherwise express the immenseness of my love.

You are the paint on my canvas.

You are the melody in my song.

Like the strings on my guitar.

You are my muse.

 

-R
 

STILL by Raven Duran

I missed you before him

In fact, you lead me straight here

Into him

Like a runaway train

I sought refuge from you

Straight to him

I missed you while we ate food

And slept on his sofa

While we laughed and talked all night about his life and mine

I still missed you

I missed you after it was all over

After the fun was done and the lights were dimmed

After everything was out because I can't pretend

That I don't miss you

I cant pretend that you aren't still my first "what if?" 

And my second "...who cares?"

Still the only one I write about

Ever, even now

How'd things get this far?

I'm home alone

And I miss you

 

-R

12:46 AM

You're too sensitive, kid by Raven Duran

I can see through them

Right to the seats of their souls

I can feel them like we're sharing heartbeats

Strangers' pain that I try on for size

Their fears try to become mine

Planting seeds in the garden of my mind

med-i-ta-tion

Relax and detach 

I try to remember

"Because that's not your path"

I want to but I can't save them all

I Love You by Raven Duran

I love you

I love you in that Johnny Cash, June Carter kind of way

I love you in that past life kind of way

The way that brings me back everytime kind of way

I just love you

I love you like I love Saturday mornings

And midnight rendezvous

I love each moment

I love you

 

-R

FREE LIKE by Raven Duran

This might be freedom

The kind you find at Disneyland on a Saturday with a park map and a fast pass

Freedom like 200 miles of open road and a playlist that’ll change your life

Free like my clean sheets on your bare skin

Free like ecstasy in the desert

It could be

This might be what I wanted

 

-R

5/24/17 1:31 pm

Cigarettes in the Dark by Raven Duran

Cigarettes in the dark

After hours I find you in that place I left

Cigarettes in the dark and I want to remember that place where we met

Background noise but I find you way back in the back of my mind

The cigarettes don't feel good — but neither do you

I guess it's the closest I'll get

You taught me many things

Some, I wish I would forget

But still you stay there, right there where I left you

I can't make up for the way that it went

So I'll cash in on the time spent — pay it forward

Until one day it all makes sense

 

-R

5.7.17 4:04 am

New Republic by Raven Duran

How complacent we all must be to believe that we must just concede

Keep things the way they used to be — so as not to rock the boat

How afraid now are the minds of the youth who only seek to find

a place of peace within their lives?

But the old won't let them grow.

They'll try their best now to repress young hearts so filled with vigilance.

But Liberty? She will take precedence — and shed their dying minds.

 

-R

1/31/2017 12:09 pm

Monochrome by Raven Duran

Multicolored stars seeking multicolored answers — the truths you only find in the dark.

 

Monochrome hearts and the stars that beat them. The colors tell the truth when they're lost.

 

-R

12/20/16 4:52 am

The Truth About Immortality by Raven Duran

And then there's me
Watching, waiting
To be whisked off to your paradise
Behind blue-brown-hazel eyes, you see me
You see me in the depths of hell and heaven alike
Breathing in your essence
Somewhere deep, down in your being I am there
So come here and tell me your story
Let me hold your hand, while we
Step over the cracks in the sidewalk
You are my biggest mystery
An eighth wonder in my mind
And as I reach for you, knowing I'm about to
Swallow the key to my only way out
I feel morality in this so-called immortality
If this is your reality, I'll go
Without thinking, without speaking
I'll go wherever you will take me
In your essence is my presence
And only you can see me

 

-R

(sometime in 2006)

Breathe by Raven Duran

I breathe and at the touch of his hand I stop
Heart racing
Is it me? I ask
Or is it ten degrees plus the Fahrenheit I've created?
Devastation as you're running through my mind
Devastation like a kind I've never felt
This room is spinning to my unspoken betrayal
I keep breathing hoping I'll voice my thoughts and I hear you
Telling me the desert never goes so long without water
Then why does it ache so bad... 
When you hurt so good? 
A thousand and one ways to kiss the ground and apologize
But will it seek to hide, my thoughts?
These thoughts, that carry me through the night
Trying to breathe
Choking—choking on acid words
My lips move and all I hear is you
I feel it, but all I hear is you
For every raindrop on this windowsill
I'm sorry will never do

 

-R

(sometime in 2004)

Side note. I found some of my very first poems, this being one of them. This one in particular is quite hard for me to read, but I'm proud to share it. Not knowing what my young mind was in preparation for.

Drop by Raven Duran

Take me to infinity, one drop

Open the door
Hold your breath

What's inside? 

Hands bound behind my back
You'll never get to feel what I feel.
Eyes shut tight — I'll never get to see how you land when you fall.

My hands will tremble catching you — laying you gently down.

Eyes
Closed


But do you know?

How you're going to reach everlasting?


Take your path, as best you know it because
A bird never follows so blindly

Say to me once, and I will tell you again
The sweetest serenade of them all

 

-R

(sometime in 2004)