Breathe / by Raven Duran

I breathe and at the touch of his hand I stop
Heart racing
Is it me? I ask
Or is it ten degrees plus the Fahrenheit I've created?
Devastation as you're running through my mind
Devastation like a kind I've never felt
This room is spinning to my unspoken betrayal
I keep breathing hoping I'll voice my thoughts and I hear you
Telling me the desert never goes so long without water
Then why does it ache so bad... 
When you hurt so good? 
A thousand and one ways to kiss the ground and apologize
But will it seek to hide, my thoughts?
These thoughts, that carry me through the night
Trying to breathe
Choking—choking on acid words
My lips move and all I hear is you
I feel it, but all I hear is you
For every raindrop on this windowsill
I'm sorry will never do

 

-R

(sometime in 2004)

Side note. I found some of my very first poems, this being one of them. This one in particular is quite hard for me to read, but I'm proud to share it. Not knowing what my young mind was in preparation for.